Serina’s Story

My name is Serina I am 27 years old. At the age of 13 I was pulled out of secondary school. My parents kept me at home and would not allow me to go back to school. At the age of 17 I got myself a job at a local warehouse as a picker and packer. After I had been working there a year, my parents told me that we were going to Pakistan on a family holiday. I was very excited. I hadn’t been on holiday before and I was so excited to see my grandparents and extended family. In September 2000, we went to Pakistan on holiday. A week into the holiday I was told by my parents that I was getting married to my first cousin. I disagreed but was told by my parents that if I didn't get married I couldn't come back to England. Although I didn’t want to, I didn’t know where to seek help and felt I had no other choice but to agree to the marriage. In the end my parents got me engaged and arranged for the wedding to take place in January 2001.

After the wedding my parents left me in Pakistan. They left me there for 6 months, hoping the marriage would work out. I couldn't believe how they’d betrayed me and left me in a country all on my own. I explained to my husband that I didn't want to get married and how my parents forced me into the marriage. He told me he didn't care, he just wanted to come to England. I wrote a letter to the Home Office explaining that my marriage was a forced marriage and I did not want to sponsor my husband to come over to the UK. Unfortunately, my letter was never acknowledged and he got his visa and then came over to England.

I was then not allowed to continue with my work. My parents told me to stay at home and make the marriage work. I was kept at home and had my mobile phone confiscated. I managed to get to the phone in the middle of the night. I called a friend and asked if he could call the police and explain what is going on and that I wanted to leave the house the next evening, when my dad was at work. The police arrived at 6.30pm and I was escorted out of the house and taken to the police station, where I gave a statement. I then went to stay at a bed and breakfast. I felt very isolated and depressed not knowing where to turn for help or support.

The police didn’t refer me to a mental health service, nor was I made aware of the existence of any services that could support me. I suffered in silence and alone for seven months until I heard an advert on the radio on BBC Asian Network about the national domestic violence helpline. I called them myself and got refuge provision. My experience at the refuge made me feel more isolated and vulnerable as I didn't receive much support; I didn't see my key worker regularly and had to register myself at the doctor, city council, and job centre without any support from anyone.

Even the doctor did not question my mental health or think that I might need support. He didn’t refer me to a counselor or a culturally-appropriate support service. In the end, I just felt that I was on my own and there was no-one out there to help me. When I went to make a claim for job seekers’ allowance I was told by a member of staff that I was stupid and should go back home as I was 20 years old and didn’t have a future without my family. After that, I couldn't help feeling that I was incapable of going on without my family, but I decided to stay strong and get a job. I was informed by a friend that my father was tracking me down through my national insurance number.

I then went to Karma Nirvana where I was supported tremendously. I contacted my family, but they said I was dead to them and I was disowned. I continued to rebuild my life. Through my work with Karma Nirvana I have gained a university qualification after having left school with no qualifications. I feel very passionate about what I do. Now, I can help and support people who are experiencing what I had to go through.