Amar called for support explaining that he was gay and his family were not accepting of his sexuality. They were pressuring him to marry and had made him have exorcisms to ‘cure’ him of being gay. He had a boyfriend- whom his family were unaware of and had plans to flee with his boyfriend abroad. He was controlled by his family and not allowed to go out, socialise etc. He had also spoken about having long hair and being made to shave it off by his family as a means of control and reinforcing that they didn’t approve of his sexuality.
He spoke about attending counselling and how this had helped but brought a lot of emotions back. He thought back to a time when his family were ‘normal’ and there was no abuse. He felt the abuse had become somewhat ‘normal’ as he had been subject to honour based abuse for a long time. He wanted to wait to leave but feared he could not go abroad with his family’s permission. He also felt his boyfriend was his only support but had become paranoid about their relationship and feared his boyfriend would leave him. He didn’t feel able to leave alone and felt trapped in the situation.
We provided ongoing emotional support to him and reinforced options available i.e. refuge, reporting to police, FMPO etc but he didn’t wish to proceed with any options. We left our support open to him and encouraged him to call at any time.