Jasvinder Glen

I am firstly a survivor of honour-based abuse. My parents wanted to arrange my marriage when I was 16 and I soon learnt that saying no was not an option. I also felt the restrictions on my life sharply throughout my growing years from my family members that included my elder sisters to keep me in a place where I could not shame my parents. I always felt different from the start, as I would question the order of things. I came to Britain in the mid sixties from the Punjab with my parents and four other siblings. I saw the first three of my sisters have arranged marriages and witnessed the abuse and felt that they were compelled to marry the men as I saw how they did not have full consultation and choice as honour became paramount.

I have had to learn to live without my original family and heard about the deaths of my parents as my siblings ensured that I never found out. My attempts at making contact were at times very traumatic to me. You have to reach a point of acceptance otherwise, your life will remain on hold forever. This decision gave me the freedom to start living. I have been disowned for 33 years now and have found many coping mechanisms one being Karma Nirvana. I  now live a very happy life and  trained as a nurse and then social worker some 28 years ago, now working in Fostering and adoption.

I am a Christian and this is a great source of strength on my daily walk in life. I have a community of my own where I feel I belong and will be cared for as well as care for others. I have known of Karma Nirvana for approx 5 years, and met other survivors, they truly are honourable people who mean a great deal to me. I learnt of Karma Nirvana after reading Jasvinder Sanghera' book 'Shame' and have never looked back. The support and understanding has been invaluable to me.

What do you do at Karma Nirvana?

I am today a Trustee having initially been a volunteer on the Honour  Network Helpline. I also speak at various events sharing my story at many Karma Nirvana platforms.

What motivates you?

I know there are so many victims we have yet to reach, especially young people. It takes me back to being that little girl who was told she was worthless, ugly and nothing good could happen for me. I rose up from this and proved them all wrong and this is what I want to pass onto to others. I hope that I can give some of that good energy back to the work of Karma Nirvana.